Screw the Zombies. Literally: With Scruggs Patented Screw-in Coffin.
Something even an undead engineer could love
Inventor Donald Scruggs and his self-boring coffin present the perfect solution for post-apocalyptic burial. This tidy invention does double-duty: get a solid workout as you protect against zombies. Given the expected power outages and chronic fuel shortages, this do-it-yourself burial vessel allows you and another survivor a good 2-3 hours cardio and upper body workout (depending on ground conditions) as you grieve.
Plus—a recent study in the Journal of Undead Ergonomics (2011Oct; 1132(10):112-20. Lazarus R, Elijah P, Wernick P, et al. Diminished lifting capacity in the recently undead) shows just how difficult overhead lifts are for zombies. So—keep it vertical!
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Image credit: Scruggs Patent Application via treehugger
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